The Parselmouths
Brittany Vahlberg (left) and Kristina Horner (right)
Background information
Based Seattle, Washington
Hogwarts house(s) Slytherin
Status Retired
Signature song "What Kind of Name is Hermione?"
Genre(s) Comedy/Folk Rock/Techno
Years active 2004-2009
Label Cheap Rent
The Butterbeer Experience, Ministry of Magic, The Moaning Myrtles
Influences Harry and the Potters
Kristina Horner (since 2004)

Eia Waltzer (since 2008)

Former members
Brittany Vahlberg (2004-2008)
"We are the Parselmouths! We write songs about Harry Potter from a Slytherin point of view. We hope you enjoy the world of wizard rock."
—The Parselmouths on their blog

The Parselmouths were a wrock band that was formed in 2004 by Kristina Horner and Brittany Vahlberg.


"The premise of the band was to create and portray very real Slytherin girls because to them, Pansy Parkinson and Millicent Bullstrode [sic] are very two dimensional, and Kristina and Brittany wanted to try to give depth to a house that is usually slammed for just being a bunch of spoiled rich kids. They have put themselves into the Harry Potter world as silly, boycrazy, mean Slytherin girls, but the Parselmouths hope that you’ll see the deeper message in a lot of their songs. Just as Draco showed his weakness in Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince, Kristina and Brittany of the Parselmouths try to show that Slytherins aren’t all just evil."
—The Parselmouths on their blog


The band's original 2004 line-up consisted not simply of the iconic duo, Kristina and Brittany, but of two more members: Charley Wright (drums) and Heather Hoganson (bass).[1] By the time The Parselmouths began touring and performing live in 2006, it had been reduced to Kristina and Brittany, who continued to play together until 2008, when Brittany took off time from the band for her marriage to Adam Sonnet.

In October 2006, The Parselmouths released their first album, called Sssss. It featured such songs as "Daddy's Tattoo" and the original version of their signature song "What Kind of Name is Hermione?".

Illegal Love Potion, their first EP, was released in June 2007 as part of the Wizard Rock EP of the Month Club 2007. In keeping with the EP's title, most of the songs were about love and relationships.

Broken Hearted Slytherins, The Parselmouths' second album, was a limited-release sampler CD containing songs from both Sssss and Illegal Love Potion. It was primarily sold at Phoenix Rising 2007.

"Until the return of her [Brittany], Krissssstina will be playing some awesssome music with Brittany and Krisssstina’s good friend Eia Waltzer(E-Uh), and their yonger [sic] brothers, Nick Horner and Matt Waltzer"
—The Parselmouths' announcement on their blog

On 11 March 2008, Kristina and Brittany announced that during Brittany's hiatus from the band, Kristina and Eia, along with their younger brothers (Nick Horner and Matt Waltzer, respectively), would be recording as The Parselmouths. Their third album, Pretty in Pink (and Green) was released later in 2008 and included the talents all three female singers, Kristina, Brittany and Eia.

After Brittany left The Parselmouths for good, Kristina and Eia (along with British YouTuber Alex Day) went on to record what would become their last album, called Spattergroit, in 2009. In 2010 Kristina, whose voice had been deteriorating, had to give up singing in order to let her vocal chords heal. This more-or-less marked the end of The Parselmouths, one of wizard rocks's oldest and most famous bands.


  • Kristina Horner - vocals (2004-2009)
  • Brittany Vahlberg - backup vocals, guitar (2004-2008)
  • Eia Waltzer - backup vocals, tambourine, tap shoes (2008-2009)

Featured artistsEdit


  • Charley Wright - drums (2004)
  • Heather Hoganson - bass (2004)
  • Nick Horner - drums (2008)
  • Matt Waltzer (2008)




Illegal Love Potion is part of the Wizard Rock EP of the Month Club (June 2007 album).



Awards and nominationsEdit

Wizard Rock People's Choice Awards 2007Edit

  • Best Female Vocals (nominated)
  • Best Album of 2006 for Sssss (nominated)
  • Best Duo (nominated)
  • Best Evil Wizard Rock Band (nominated)
  • Best Album Art for Sssss artwork by Justin Schmauser (nominated)
  • Best Music Video for "Being in Slytherin is Not Half Bad" (nominated)
  • Best Comedy (nominated)
  • Best Folk or Country (won)

Wizard Rock People's Choice Awards 2008Edit

  • Best EP for Illegal Love Potion (won)
  • Best Collaboration for "Snape vs. Snape" with Ministry of Magic (won)

Wizard Rock People's Choice Awards 2009Edit

  • Band Using the Most Exotic Instrument for the use of Eia's tap shoes (won)

Wizard Rock People's Choice Awards 2010Edit

  • Best Slytherin Band (won)


  1. theparselmouths: BIG NEWS

External linksEdit

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